nice mouth feel: again, my cankers

so i went to a wedding yesterday and oh man was it weird and awesome. i did not have my camera, so please allow the supplemental pictures of cats partying in varying capacities.

so this is how it went down... i awoke after a night of serious partying, dry heaved for a while, and took a train with my friend suz to ct. we were picked up by her mother, and while i sat in the back of the car and ate my subway club sandwich suz and her mother engaged in a conversation about genital cuffs. actually, i think the conversation was specific to scrotal cuffs, but i won't be a hardass with the details. the day was off to a booming start.

the wedding was in a church and the pastor/priest fellow was indian and had a very thick accent. all i caught from the service was that marriage can only be between a man and a women. the priest was very adamant about this and told us that in regard to this issue we should not pay attention to the media. whatever.

at the reception i got wasted and these are some of the things i thought about or that transpired:

1. when the bride and groom were introduced to everyone the song playing was "pump up the jams." indeed.

2. it was suggested that i join the single girls and attempt to catch the bride's garter belt. seriously...the old people at our table thought i was gay.

3. while listening to the ton loc song that was playing i overheard the new englanders at my table talking about something called the D.A.R. evidently this means "daughters of the american revolution." pretty good.

4. i think after my 6th beer i told the elderly women sitting across from me that i once sexually assaulted a horse in berlin, and that i thought the bride's mother gave" great helmet." oops.

5. evidently that ymca song is the best thing in the world. when it started playing even the fattest of the men got up to giggle their jello bodies. gross. when asked why i was not dancing i told the man across from me that i was "too legit to quit."