hold still while i gas you

so it has come to my attention that certain people are upset with my blogging frequency. i apologize to no one but cupcake, who evidently has replaced me with josh. however, i suspect the worm will turn in my favor this week because tomorrow josh and i will have much sex and take many gross pictures. makes sense to me. actually, tomorrow is my big b-day and the occasion will be celebrated with approximately 25 hamburgers and bloated, flabby-gay-boy sex. should be good.

it has also come to my attention that a potential pluralization of my fake (showcasing) name is gilhi. i like that.


so....for thanksgiving i went home to philly to meet my parents (pictured above).



indy came with me...



but the rest of my family stayed on the walls. uncle watermelon is such a home body.






for the thanksgiving stuff my parents and i drove to LBI to meet my brother and his in-laws. the native people in these beach towns always spooked me...they look so bizarre...skinny, tall, barky and surrounded by leaves. i mean jeez, get some pants guys. where's the humility?



indy had to stay home...sorry indy.



i really didn't want to go (seeing how i tend to stick out at these family occasions and blurt out things like, "the government!"), so my parents dropped me off at this shack.



actually, i kinda wanted to go, but i knew i wouldn't be able to eat because for some reason my mouth couldn't close. seriously. i went to the dentist for an "emergency" appointment the day previous and was freaked out because i had my wisdom teeth removed last year, and for the life of me couldn't figure why i was fine 24 hours ago. the dentist knew i was worried, so he showed me some of the tools he would be using. below is essentially the conversation that ensued.

dentist: "this is the scraper, this is the poker, and this happy little fellow is called the gouger. now the first thing i'll be doing is chiseling some teeth out of your jawbone. hold still while I gas you."

gilhouse: "huh?" (terrible pooping noise)



in reality (my reality) the dentist poked around, took an x-ray, and after looking at the x-ray suggested i was faking. well, almost. the dentist said there was no reason i shouldn't be able to open and close my mouth, and that maybe i should consider the fact that i'm crazy. what a smart dentist.



this is where we ate dinner. pretty, but not what i'm used to.



this is snickers. a nice fellow.


on the saturday following thanksgiving my family had a smaller thanksgiving at my parent's house in philly. instead of the usual feast we "mixed it up" and ate a monkey's heart. snacktacular.




indy enjoyed his first thanksgiving.





being home can be a trial sometimes. just imagine my candle parents and the gilhi family. a weird bunch, to say the least. this is our family's barn.





and this is our 1959 rambler. it stopped running, so we pushed it into the woods.





this is a group of japanese tourists taking pictures of my parent's property.